I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
