If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
