Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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