Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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