it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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