I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
i will never coherently bang her
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
