I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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