my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He felt like a one man threesome
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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