bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
