I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
