I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize