last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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