I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
