nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
