TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
