yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
