all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
