maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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