If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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