Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize