the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
