What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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