Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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