I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
