Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
