just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
