bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Just took my morning after pill in the library
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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