Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
