If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
