I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
My ass is underappreciated
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize