He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
