Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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