What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
