Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
