But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
