can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
