Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
