Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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