Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
