don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
