watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
