Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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