i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
