Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
