butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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