It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
