I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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