i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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