I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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