Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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