yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's blow job season.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
